Where do I start? Just because you have a hammer everything looks like a nail?

You clearly do not understand programming languages or their various ways of performing operations. You choose the way to arrive at a result based on many factors, including context, readability, performance and extensibility to name a few.

A ternary (one-liner with a question mark as you so ignorantly described) should be use specifically when you want to convey the binary nature of the result. As soon as you see a ternary in a well written function your brain says there's a choice between two alternatives.

An if/else (in my opinion) should be reserved for two divergent paths of operation. However, in a really well written function if those paths are quite different then a function for each path should be written and I might have arrived at those functions upstream of the need to even perform an if/else.

Cascading if/else statements are a blight to humanity and should be avoided at all costs. Perhaps you've never heard of dispatchers?

Senior Brogrammer? I would say your programming acumen is more on the kiddie scripter level.

As far as dumping on people that write Python is concerned, I will agree that this language does attract a lot of amateurs simply because it's easy to learn. But there are master craftsman in every language that play their language's syntax like a Stradivarius.

I'm just glad I don't have to review your code. Write something useful for once.